Sunday, January 3, 2010

To do the right thing or not?

Several years ago, I was working as a support worker with an agency in Edmonton. I had clients, mothers, families with addiction, abuse, parenting, relationship problems. My job was to stabilize the family as much as possible. One client had been reunited with her children and was doing her best to stay sober despite some negative relationship difficulties. Joan had done really well, staying sober, returning to school, and taking care of her 4 children. We had been working together for about 4 months. Some of those close to her did not have her best interests at heart and wished to see her fail.
There was an episode where I had visited her when she had been drinking. This was the first time in 4 months.
Her sister was terribly drunk and had brought the alcohol to my Joan’s house. I looked after everything and I struggled with telling the social worker. However, I did. The worker Teresa, by name wanted to apprehend the children but wanted to cover her ass first. Two weeks with Teresa calling me, my supervisor, having meetings with her supervisor until finally it culminated with a conference with my client’s therapist.
The therapist watched me, I knew she was choosing her words carefully, but I could feel that she really wasn’t as supportive as my client thought. A day later, my supervisor paged me to say my client’s children would be taken. What the therapist had told Teresa without me had sealed the deal. I then called Teresa , the social worker, and discovered she was now operating without a heart. She was absolutely going to grab the children.

I spent all afternoon going over what I needed to do. I waited outside my client’s house until she returned from school. I told her what could be done to help her. Everything was set up for her and her mother to go to court the following morning.
The following day, her mother applied for a guardianship order and received it. When the social worker arrived with the police that day to take the children from my client, they were not there. My client’s mother had them at her house. Nothing could be done to remove the children now.
The social worker must have been angry because I was pulled from working with that client and a new worker was sent in. I didn’t care, in fact, I remember laughing when I was told by my supervisor. A year or two later, my supervisor ran into that client who expressed her gratitude for not losing her children.
I had lots of clients and I spent a great deal of time advocating for them. However, there were a few clients that I knew were incapable of looking after their children, due to being FAS, abusive or addictive or both. I always tried to follow my heart and do what my heart felt needed to be done.
When I acted heartlessly, I regretted my actions. When I operated from my heart and broke the rules, it became easier the next time to repeat my actions and not regret them.
When I was going through this, deciding to help my client, I was excited and scared because I thought I was going to get fired. That was the worst that could happen. I would not be hung or shot or burned at the stake. Why was I so afraid to do the right thing? I was afraid of the disapproval. Why did I care what other people thought? This was hard to do, but I was compelled. I was so excited that I could NOT do anything else but help Joan. I still waited with bated breath to hear what else would happen. Believe me though I felt nervous. Today, I am so glad that I did what I did.